AOC on the other hand has contributed all of 4 Arsenal goals & 1assist (am sure we all remember that one, even Arshavin does) in the 16games he has played in, taking his goal contribution versus games to… wait for it,… 31%! Now before we all start yapping about age difference and all, i took the pains to track down 19yr old Theo’s stats for you, which read 39games, 7goals, 5assists back in the 07/08 season. The goals contribution was errr… ahem, 31%! Ofcourse Ox hasn’t

I admit i must still be very dazed from that Sunday lunch, but it most certainly isn’t a result of some beer routine, after all, the Totts-who liked to refer to themselves as “Tott-senal” or the more mundane “Arsenal-lite,” prior to that game- cleaned out every bar i went to back in Uganda (I was told the same happened in North London)! So, while the entire globe came back to earth from planet Arsenal, i grew weary in sourcing for DVD playbacks that i thought those dunderheads must have compiled from that game to help themselves with when next the Arsenal canon fires off warning shots in the neighborhood. To beat the weariness, i opted to glance across the internet and landed on some statistics that i always suspected Theo Walcott- that much maligned player and one whose name the Spuds would rather write in x-rated mode than say out loud- to have. To make it easier to understand, i threw in the famed Ox’s weight for good measure and this is what i discovered;-

That in the 35games Theo has played this season, he has racked up a measly 8goals & 10assists for RVP- ok not all of them. That means he has directly been involved in a goal in 51% of the games he has played in thus far- enough for an aspiring politician to get to the big office and help himself to “much needed” state funds back here in Africa.

AOC on the other hand has contributed all of 4goals & 1assist (am sure we all remember that one, even Arshavin does) in the 16games he has played in, taking his goal contribution versus games to… wait for it,… 31%! Now before we all start yapping about age difference and all, i took the pains to track down 19yr old Theo’s stats for you, which read 39games, 7goals, 5assists back in the 07/08 season. The goals contribution was errr… ahem, 31%! Ofcourse Ox hasn’t had the pleasure of a continued run in the team, a la Theo back in 08, which is excusable. Considering Theo’s lesser weight (as in literally, he weighs 66kgs while Ox is on 70), i would imagine it has been very hard for him to measure up to the premier league bullies who tackle him with obvious intent to install ventilators in his lungs. He has become very susceptible to injuries as a result, which will always affect any other players’ contributions.

Many gooners have insisted that Walcott’s football brain isn’t growing, and are opting for the supposedly more industrious Oxlade Chamberlain, but then again, what kind of weight of expectation has Ox had to endure? Anything like a World Cup at 17? Or to fit into the boots of Thierry Henry and feature in the EA playstations as a poster boy? The only person Ox has measured against him is err… ahem, Theo Walcott, who by many people’s and my standard isn’t anywhere like TH14, or Robert Pires. That’s the kind of environment a footballer can thrive in, if he’s focused. Too much praise however might make Ox aspire to be officially better than Walcott then he can rest, go order a Pizza or two at McDonald’s to pile on more weight and swagger his way into retirement having achieved the one expectation that was ever placed upon him. Yet i marvel that despite being so undervalued at such a young age (22, at which age a certain Thierry Henry signed for Arsenal with not much hurrays going about), Theo boasts a passing accuracy of 78% & an 87% aggression, better than Chamberlain’s 76% pass accuracy and 85 for aggression. There will be arguments about age, but let there be arguments about environment too.

I love both players, but honestly if i had to rely on one of the two to change a game to save my life, for all his inconsistencies, i would choose a fully fit Theo. The Ox, after all has also exhibited signs of inconsistency lately so maybe to withhold judgement for a season or two would be proper as i personally long for the time when these two will take charge of either flanks to devastating effect- assuming Arsene Wenger changes his mind about big money transfers and installs real world beaters in their backsides so they can get a game on in each week, and Ox gets real life winners to measure himself against, not a bunch of jokers content on picking up their weekly wages. Don’t shoot me Almunia!

That’s my take for the day, am back to my day job of looking up that DVD, and my guess is that Spuds are buying them off the shelves for their own self help manuals. “Arsenal-lite,” my foot!

Rgds,

Don Oloo.

Mean Lean’s Response

Thank you the ‘Don Oloo’ an entertaining read.

For good or for bad Theo Walcott has everyone talking and that has been the case since he arrived from Southampton as a fresh faced teenager. It is quite easy to forget his age and without wanting to sound patronising to many of his detractors, I think the developmental aspect of a footballer goes over the heads of some. While I remain frustrated with Walcott’s technique at such a high level I have never doubted his end product.

This lack of footballing brain nonsense gets on my very last nerve, I must say. Chris Waddle says it and ever since then it is the buzz word imprinted into supporters subconscious. I would go as far as to say he has a very good footballing brain. His off the ball movement and timing of his runs in behind full backs is of a very high level.

I am very surprised by his goal tally this season, possibly a little down to the lack of key passes with the departure of Cesc Fabregas perhaps but his poor misses against QPR, Bolton and a few others has not fooled me and I am sure the manager. As van Persie says, Theo Walcott will score goals, many goals and that to me has never been in question. He has always shown that goals is not a problem until this season.

It is difficult to compare Walcott and Chamberlain, two very different players although they play in the same position. I would be very surprised if Oxlade-Chamberlain does not turn into the more accomplished player, the more gifted talent but if Walcott ever locks in his range of consistency then he has the potential to be one of the most effective wide forwards in the game.

I just pray that his touch and link up play continues to develop from now until 25 or so, if it doesn’t then he may continue to give sporadic performances. Let’s take Theo out of training sessions and just hand him over to Kanu and let him spend the weeks teaching him close control, once he gets that then the world is his oyster.

I hope you were successful with your DVD hunting.